Wanted: Collective Nouns for the Kitchen

Wanted: Collective Nouns for the Kitchen — TheMessyBaker.com

Wanted: Collective Nouns for the Kitchen

Wanted: Collective Nouns for the Kitchen — TheMessyBaker.com

Wanted: Nouns

As cooks, we have enough verbs – although whether or not we should use them is up for debate. Knife in hand, you can mince, chop, dice, slice, Julienne and pare. Got at spoon? Stir, beat, cream, fold or spread. Add some heat and the options seems limitless — brown, fry, sear, sauté, deglaze, braise, broil, bake, simmer or roast. Heck. We even have fancy words for doing nothing. Twiddle your thumbs or surf the net while the turkey rests, the beef marinates, and berries macerate.

As I said, I’ve got enough verbs.

I am, however, sadly lacking in the noun department. Specifically, collective nouns for the kitchen —like the vocabulary we have for animals. I imagine Poe rubbed his hands in glee when he learned about a murder of crows. As a cat owner, I assure you no term captures feline self-adoration like a pride of lions.

But what about cooks? Surely we’re more than a mere group. Should we be a roulade? And cookbook authors who cling to old paper books. Would we be a clutch?Clearly we need new phrases.

Even our miscellanies are neglected. I know. I know. We have sets, collections and nests of dishes, bowls, measuring cups and such. But do any of these words capture the utility and diversity of  those odd-sized wooden spoons jammed into a pottery bowl on your counter? How do you describe the eclectic assortment of kitchen gadgets cluttering up your drawers? And “set” doesn’t really apply to a disorderly collection of mismatched mugs or tea cups.

Surely cooks and their collections deserve more descriptive names.

What do you collect and what noun would fit? I’ll start. I have an army of appliances lined up on my counter. They’re always at the ready and obey my orders.

Over to you…

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10 Comments
  • Catherine
    Posted at 17:30h, 22 April

    Collections = kitchenalia.

    I heart my kitchenalia klutter……

  • maggie
    Posted at 01:55h, 23 April

    How about a stirring of spoons? A slicing of knives? A stabbing of forks?
    They are all sub-collections of kitchenalia…..I love the word “kitchenalia.”

  • Donna
    Posted at 03:36h, 23 April

    Hoiw about a “mess” of cooks—or a “stew” of cooks–“kitchenalia” is great~!

  • Charmian Christie
    Posted at 13:45h, 23 April

    Kitchenalia. I’m so stealing this phrase! Thanks.

  • Charmian Christie
    Posted at 13:46h, 23 April

    Very clever. A slicing of knives! Works for me. Thanks.

  • Charmian Christie
    Posted at 13:47h, 23 April

    Donna, in my world a “mess of cooks” is PERFECT. Why didn’t I think of that?! Thanks so much for this great contribution!

  • Lisa MacColl
    Posted at 14:37h, 23 April

    A throw of pottery mugs…

  • Charmian Christie
    Posted at 14:48h, 23 April

    Bingo! Oh man, I’m slapping my forehead at that one. A throw of mugs is perfect. It’s now in my kitchen vocabulary! Thanks so much. This one was driving me nuts.

  • sac longchamp sur mesure
    Posted at 04:47h, 16 October

    Sac à bandoulière qui laisse les mains libres est devenu le modèle le plus désiré en 2011. Il est maniable, utilisable, et aussi léger, Longchamp il pourrait être à la fois ludique ainsi que stylé. Diverses versions let flow tous les go?ts, en plus de fonctionnalités font de ce sac un must-have let flow toutes les filles.

  • Pingback:Herbed Rotisserie Chicken | The Messy Baker
    Posted at 13:18h, 30 March

    […] We need a new word: In the past, I lamented the lack of culinary collective nouns. Today, I realize we need a verb. And that verb should be “rotisserate.” Definition: to cook on […]